Zombie Gnomes – Los Angeles, CA

zombie-gnomes

In the wake of such TV series as “The Walking Dead,” Zombies are not only taking over our televisions but our gardens as well. No longer are the cutsey, red-capped garden gnomes of the past, like the british-accented Travelocity gnome enough to satisfy gnome lovers everywhere, there is a dark force taking over the gnome world. Call it Zombie Apocalypse, Lawn of the Dead or Gnombies, these ugly suckers have invaded our gardens and are thirsting for blood.

“Something bad has happened in the garden. The once happy garden gnomes have been infected by a strange virus which has turned them into flesh-eating monsters. There are only a few survivors left who are desperately trying to stay alive.”

California artists, Chris Server and Jane DeRosa have cashed in on the zombie mania by selling hand-painted and hand-casted zombie garden gnomes along with other zombie trinkets like key chains and car ornaments. The figures range from Patient Zero with his half-melted face to Doomsday Dan, a survivor who believes this plague is the wrath of god.

The gory, blood soaked gnomes can be used to chase away vermin and other unwanted visitors to your garden or just be a unique, decoration to bring dread or pleasure to onlookers.

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As Chris and Jane’s sales pitch explains, “You won’t know the true meaning of terror until you feel that nip at your ankle and see your once-quaint garden gnome now thirsting for your blood.”

The gnomes range from $21 for a single gnome up to $55 for a collection of characters. The masterpiece of the bunch is “Bye Bye Birdie,” a ghastly scene of three zombie gnomes chowing down on the guts of a pink lawn flamingo. E.W. Baker II from Colorado Springs, CO is another merchant on Etsy selling zombie gnomes under the company name of Darkside Creations.

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But perhaps the mascot of all the zombie gnomes is the “Gnombies,” created by The Dark Garden, another seller of zombie themed gnomes. The Gnombie is 20 inches tall by 14 inches wide and goes and sells for hefty price of $126.00. The Gnombies are garden variety Gnomes that have been infected with the Zombie virus.

“Gnombie Pandemic Continues to Spread BOSTON MA: The Gnombie Pandemic continues to reach an all time high with multiple sightings all over the Eastern seaboard of the United States which are now estimated to reach over 100 cases in just a mere week…it is the advice of Bay State National Guard to follow the following instructions: Gardens should be avoided at all costs, weeding is not that important. Bring your animals inside and do not let them out until this situation has been stabilized. Look for little footprints in your garden, lawn, driveway, as well as, claw marks on your other lawn ornaments, front/side/garage doors and if you find any of these contact your local authorities immediately. Be careful who you pickup hitchhiking as they blend into society quite well SEND IN PICTURES IF YOU THINK YOU HAVE IDENTIFIED ONE! Stay tuned for a weekly update as this crisis continues…”

NOTE: Literary attempts to inform the public of the nightmare of Garden Gnomes gone bad, can be found in “Goosebumps Most Wanted #1: Planet of the Lawn Gnomes” by R.L. Stine published by Scholastic, Inc.

The story follows Jay Gardner, a mischievous kid who can’t stay out of trouble. Luckily, Jay’s move to a new neighborhood gives him Jay a chance at a fresh start. But there’s something odd about Jay’s new town. Why does everyone have lawn gnomes in front of their homes? And why is everyone afraid to go outside at night? The lawn gnomes don’t come to life at night—do they? Jay is about to learn that mischief can quickly turn to horror.

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Another page turner with advice on how to battle naughty gnomes can be found in the 2010 illustrated book “How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack: Defend Yourself When the Lawn Warriors Strike (And They Will)” by Chuck Sambuchino published by Ten Speed Press.

The ads for the book declare, “How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack is the only comprehensive survival guide that will help you1) prevent, 2) prepare for, and 3) ward off an imminent home invasion by the common garden gnome. Once thought of as harmless yard decorations, evidence is mounting that these smiling lawn statues are poised and ready to wreck havoc. The danger is real.”

Chris and Jane’s Place (Website)
Etsy – Chris and Jane (Website)
Etsy – DSC Zombie Gnomes (Website)
RevenantFX (Website)
Etsy – RevenantFX (Website)
Zombie Gnomes (Facebook)
Zombie Gnomes (Twitter)
Zombie Gnomes (Website)
Gnombies (Website)
Gnombies (Facebook)
Evil Gnomes (Facebook)

Pinterest (Website)
Planet of the Lawn Gnomes (Webpage)
How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack (Website)

How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack (Video)
Doritos Superbowl Commercial – Gnome VS. Zombie (Video)
Parents in Uproar Over IKEA Gnome Ad (Video)
New IKEA advert 2013 (Video)
Zombie Apocalypse Garden Gnomes from ThinkGeek (Video)

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About

Born in Philadelphia, Jerome Alphonse Holst worked 30 years as a librarian. He has since retired and lives in Greensboro, North Carolina. Mr. Holst is also the author of the children’s books “Norman the Troll,” "Norman the Troll and the Haunted House," and "Gretchen and the Gremlins." In addition, he penned the fantasy novel “The Adventures of Glinda Gale,” a retelling of “The Wizard of Oz" and the reference text “The Encyclopedia of Movie and TV Insults.” .

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Posted in Statues and Carvings

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